DavezMental’s Blog

Wow…this blog is way over due….for many reasons….Obviously it’s been too long since I wrote anything…but so much craziness has happened this week, I have to vent a little bit…

First things first….this is some old news, but because I’ve been so busy, I haven’t had the chance to write about the topic….but were people really keeping their kids out of school because of Obama’s speech?? I mean seriously….enough is enough….These racist people (I want to say Republicans, but i’m sure it was more than just Republicans that did so) are really leaving bad tastes in people’s mouths and making America look bad, after in November we looked so good. I can’t believe the nerve of these congressmen saying President Obama had a hidden agenda by talking to the kids. And some were trashing him for saying he was an inspiration for many….well, news flash. Most the kids he was talking to will not be old enough to vote when it’s time for his re-election. So, how would he really try to sway kids to his policies, number one….number two, why in the world would he talk to kids about politics you morons….I and the rest of normal people saw him speaking to children as a great thing. Like a friend’s father told me, no one cared when Bush Sr. and Regan did it, so why all the fuss when Obama does it. Lastly, are these people so blind that they don’t see that Obama really is an Inspiration….I mean he should be for us all! Come on now…How many people thought we would ever have a black president?? I know I didn’t! As a teacher, I was flabergasted that Obama was going to talk to the kids…In fact, because I teach in an all black school, I couldn’t wait for the kids to see it…now, only if my school was on the ball and had planned for it properly so all the kids could watch it….anyways racist Americans….Enough is Enough…

Then, you have that guy calling Obama a liar when he is giving his Healthcare talk. Honestly, I was mad I missed that speech, because I am very ignorant about his plan and whats going on. But, I really doubt Obama is a liar….but lets say he is…would a white president have gotten disrespected like that? I am glad President Carter called this guy out and called him a racist…..Also, I love how there are all these people protesting Obama and saying he is trying to ruin the country….People forget he is cleaning up Bush’s mess….and what if Obama didn’t give all these bailouts and give out all this stimulus money?? How bad of a shape would we really be….In my eyes, Obama is doing a great job…..I believe everyone should have healthcare…we are not a third world country….we are America….Enough is Enough….

Then you have Kanye West….I swear to God, everytime he pulls a stunt like he did on Taylor Swift, I wish I was a celebrity….Because, if I was and he did something like that to me, I would whoop his spoiled brat ass….straight up…and how come he always picks on people who in no way would fight back….shoot…I’d love to see him pull a stunt like that on 50 Cent or Ghostface Killah…or someone of that sorts….then again, 50 hasn’t won any awards lately….anyways…I’m glad Leno called him out…but now some are calling Leno a bad guy….stop…Kanye is a spoiled brat that needs to be put in his place….Enough is Enough….

Last topic is liars….Have you ever wanted to believe in someone or something……even though on paper, the reality of the event or person you wanted to believe in had no hope of happening or getting better….but you still wanted to believe really really bad….Have you ever had people tell you to leave someone or something alone, but you wanted to believe in them…and gave them all you got only to find out they really had problems that you couldn’t fix or help fix….well, I have…..There is nothing worse than trying to play someone for a fool…that is a low thing to do…..well, thank goodness someone opened my eyes to be careful, because I now realized that I can no longer believe in this person and it’s time to move on…I am no longer playing the fool…haha….gotta find people in my life that aren’t gonna lie and try to play me….anyways…Enough is Enough….

That’s all I have for you….someone told me that my blogs are too long…and, well, I agree….sooooo…that’s all folks! Enough is Enough!

PS RIP Patrick Swayze…aka Darry Curtis

Buy 2 shirts, Get 1 FREE….

That’s right everybody….since i’m a teacher, you know I have a special place in my heart for this time of year…sooooo….since I’ve been back to work for 2 days and classes officially start exactly in 11 hours in my district, I am having a back to school sale…it will run from right NOW til next Wednesday….

For every 2 shirts purchased, you will get one FREE….So, let’s try this out children…if you buy 8 shirts, how many free do you get?? 4! That’s right…you see, that’s why I get paid the big bucks as a math teacher! lol

So, for all of you that are going to take advantage of the sale, simply click on the shirts you are purchasing (hit the ‘add to cart’ buttons), then in the special instructions box, write me a lil note indicating what shirts you want FREE and what size!

Sale will end Midnight, your time, Wednesday, September 9th!

I remember it like it was yesterday. I think the day will go down as one of those, “where were you when you heard/found out about…” days. I remember where I was when the Spaceship Challenger blew up. I remember where I was when Tupac died. I remember where I was when Biggie died. I remember where I was when the Twin Towers got bombed in ‘93 and I remember where I was when I first heard about the plane attacks. I remember where I was when I heard Michael Jackson died. And well, I think I’ll always remember where I was when I heard that Michael Vick signed with my favorite sports team: The Philadelphia Eagles.

On the scale of things, Michael Vick’s signing with the Eagles is not even as close to being as important as the previously mentioned events…and I would never compare it to the horror of 9/11. But I do think I will remember where I was when Vick signed with the Birds. And to tell you the truth, the aftermath has a chance to be very positive, very negative, or have no big affect at all.

My first gut reaction when I saw Michael Vick on the cover of the Philadelphia Daily News, was why was this idiot on the cover, when the Phillies are playing some ridiculous baseball. They just finished a 3 game sweep of the Cubs in Chicago ( I was at 2 of those games, including Pedro Martinez’s first start). Well, after a day of running around, I was back in the airport, off to go visit my mom in AZ, when I saw the paper. I went to one of those Airport book stores and bought up just about every Michael Jackson tribute magazine when I saw the newspaper. I had no desire to buy a paper, because there are tons of newspapers laying around the airport and I learned to save my money and just pick up someone’s trash left behind….but then I saw the headlines…and I forked over an additional 75 cents to get one.

I never was a big fan of Michael Vick. It was nothing personal, but I am a die-hard, rabid Donovan McNabb fan. Just like I didn’t like Steve Young when he played because his running ability drew comparisons of him to my other favorite player’s (Randall Cunningham-who should be in the Hall of Fame by the way) running ability, I didn’t like Vick because he drew the same comparison’s to Donovan’s. Anyways, when he got caught for the dog fighting thing and sent to jail, I was happy. Why? Yes, dogfighting is terrible, but I was more happy to see him go, because him and his Falcons were getting scary….and I just wanted him to leave the league!

So, fast forward to that Friday in the Philly airport…I was confused why the Birds would sign Vick. I was a little worried because my first instinct was to think of how this would affect Donovan and give more ammo for his pathetic haters….then I looked at it as a waste of money and just figured it would draw alot of negative publicity to the franchise…..So, I didn’t know what to think and decided to nap on it. About halfway to AZ, I woke up and started reading the paper, when the army guy next to me and said, “Man, the Eagle’s Offense is going to be unstoppable, now…I’d hate to play them!” That’s when it hit me! YESSSSSSS!!!!!! Great freaking move! Not only do we have a quality number 2 QB, but we have an offensive weapon in Vick! I all of a sudden got really excited and have been ever since….flashes of a better Slash Stewart came to my head…

I was glued to the internet and the tv the next few days reading and watching everything Michael Vick…unfortunately I missed 60 Minutes (damn family vacation!). I started to become a Michael Vick fan ever since then…why?? Well, I am always inclined to route for the underdog…and the way this man is being treated is ridiculous….Do I agree with dog fighting? No! Do I think what he did was right? Absolutely not! But I do believe in America and the right to live your life. Learn from your mistakes and move on…

These Animal Rights activists are being flat out ridiculous….Their protesting and nasty words….the Philly media should also be ashamed of themselves as well. Here is the deal people….what Michael Vick did was very very wrong….but what all of these critics and Animal Rights people tend to forget is that the man paid for his mistakes. He did the crime and he did the time….20 months in jail….and if that isn’t enough, the guy lost a $130 million contract (not including endorsements) and filed for bankruptcy…..enough is enough….let the guy play…

Alot of people are giving the Eagles and their coaches/owners a lot of flack. Saying that Michael Vick deserves a second chance is a copp out and poor excuse for signing the man….Well, morons, they signed the man b/c of his athletic ability. But to please the idiots like yourselfs they had to say it was b/c of a second chance….I ask all these Animal Rights people this question…What about HUMAN RIGHTS??? Did we not forget about them?? This is America people….

What’s really scary though, is what could possibly go wrong. You see, Michael Vick would be a huge help to these Animal Rights organizations. He could be the face of these companies, but they don’t want him. Well, there is a culture thing here. Most animal lovers are white. And most dog-fighters are black. What if Peyton Manning was the head of this dog fighting ring? Would he be shunned the same way?? Would he be getting this much hate from these Animal Activists?? I don’t think so. Black people/Black Rights organizations know this. So, just as there will be white people protesting against Vick, there will be black people protesting for-Vick. I just hope this doesn’t get ugly. Michael Vick could reach dog-fighters that these white-Animal Rights people can’t…but they won’t let it be…I just hope in time they figure all this out.

Just to clarify though, in no way am I saying 100% of the people against Vick are white, and 100% of the people for Vick black. Nor am I saying that 100% of dog-fighters are black and 100% of Animal Rights people are white…I’m just saying majority rules. I just hope that things don’t get ugly….I’m proud to say most of my white family are pro-Vick….even the Giant Fan ones…Too bad my uncle sold his tickets to tonight’s game weeks ago, or else I’d be driving to PA to buy my Michael Vick jersey and then off to the game instead of writing this blog….I just hope things remain civil in Philly tonight….and as stadiums for rest of the year…This has the makings of a Black vs. White thing all over it….and I just hope it doesn’t turn into that….especially after the strides this country took by voting Obama as president last year….I hope people wake up and realize, yes what Michael Vick is disturbing, but he paid for his crime, now let the guy play ball….Maybe an animal lover on the field will crush him…let that be the only harm that comes his way…

Like I said, it could really get ugly….all this over a child’s game….Who let the dogs out??

Nine months…

I’ve had writer’s block for nine months….That’s a very long time…I’ve had so many opportunities to write, too. I would say laziness, a busy schedule, procrastination, and a much needed time to stay away helped add to the block of this writer….during the nine-month absence I felt a change in myself…people change all the time, but it’s rare that one recognizes the change, especially as it’s happening….so, here are the highlights from the last nine months…

Last time I wrote, I wrote about how I didn’t think Obama would win the election….well, I was wrong…and I’m glad for that…for the first time since 9/11 I was really proud to be American….I mean, i’ve always had that American pride…I’m not one of these Anti-American Americans, but for the first time in a while, I was really proud of America and how far the country has come with this election. What made it even more special was the fact that I work in a black school district…seeing the pride of these students and the community was such a great thing to witness…only a racist couldn’t appreciate it….That was definitely a special time….too bad most Americans forgot about that, as the Obama bashing has already begun…shoot, the Republicans are real assholes….everything Obama has done from his first day in office is criticized…do these idiots really think he’s not an American Citizen??? Anyways, that’s another topic for another day….

The next significant thing that happened to me was I realized I should stop being a baby. I’m definitely one to not sweat the small things, and I’ve been told I’m so easy-going, patient, and cool/calm/collected that it’s ridiculous, and all this is true, but I tend to dwell on things and let my self get thrown off once and a while off of things that are really no big deal…shoot, I am Dave, but I am human, too! lol….anyways, the first significant thing that happened was when the Friday before winter break at my school, we had a snow day, which as you know prolongs the school year….as someone who loves summer, that irritated the hell out of me….not the fact that the snow day came when we only had 1.5 days left of school before break, but because we had a snow day on a day in which it didn’t even snow…just the threat of snow shut down the district….

Well, as I started to feel sorry for myself because that one day was going to greatly affect my summer vacation (u know one day is huge) then I realized that I was headed to London in 4 days with one of my best friends from college during the winter break and before that I was gonna see my family for the holidays….well, it hit me that I let this non-snow-snow day get me in a bad mood, when I have kids in my class that don’t really celebrate Christmas….and I don’t mean this in a preachy Christian way…I mean this because they are either very poor, or don’t even live with their families. I am not from a rich family….we are far from wealthy, yet I’ve never had a bad Christmas…and usually got what I wanted from my Christmas list (except for those trips to Hawaii and Alaska I used to always ask for)…and I have kids that are Christians and acknowledge Christmas as a holiday, yet get absolutely nothing….and so many of my students are not raised by their parents….they live with aunts, uncles, grandparents, parent’s friends, or foster families….and it hit me, that I really had a lot to be thankful for….so, now whenever I start to get depressed over some b.s. I use what my students TAUGHT me and get over it real quickly….I really admire my kids for what they go through and how they still manage to smile and concentrate on school work…..yes, some misbehave at times…but a lot of times it’s not their fault…and I’ve noticed the ones that really misbehave are the ones from the good homes…imagine that…

Going to London was also significant…I mean England is the closest country to the US after Canada, yet there is something about going to another country that affects you and makes you look at life different….I’m not exactly sure why or how…but it did….even though the highlight of my trip was watching the E-A-G-L-E-S embarrass T.O. and the Cowbitches….actually that wasn’t the highlight, but it was a cool/unforgettable part of the trip…maybe it was the comradery felt with one of my best friends, maybe it was my first international soccer match, maybe it was just feeling like a foreigner, or maybe it was the tours of all the old-historical places…who knows..

After the trip there were a few things that went on that really helped me put life in perspective….I don’t feel totally comfortable writing about some of them just right now, but the next four months were very interesting….not that I did anything crazy…but I felt myself change for the better…I really felt like I was finding myself….but let’s fast forward to June…

June was the last month of school….and my job has been a real big part of my life….I live for my work…and I’m ok with that…my job is very rewarding…and I’m very proud of what I do and how I do it…but the job isn’t all “sunshine and rainbows” (a quick Rocky quote for you)…June is bittersweet….you are excited that the summer is coming (although I dreadfully taught summerschool this year)….but you are also sad that your kids are leaving you…especially as an 8th grade teacher, your kids are graduating….I guess it’s the same feeling (or as close to the same feeling one could get) as to what parents feel when their kids grow up and move out of home….there was one student though that I was so proud of….

This one girl in particular was one of the biggest-pain-in-the-you-know-what’s when the year first started….A child that didn’t care about anything…school was more for socializing….she didn’t do her work, was failing, disrespectful, rude, etc…I remember trying to talk to her everyday about her behavior and lack of ambition….her response was, “I don’t care” to so many things, oh so many times…there were so many conversations out in the hallway…I was called “aggravating” so many times…yet as I yanked her (not literally) into the hallways more and more, this child started to open up….and would you know it, she started to believe in herself…and her school work became important to her….the boys and the socializing became second….as the year went on, less and less did I have to yank her into the hallway for these talks…and less and less did she call me aggravating….this child went from in-danger of failing to almost making honor roll the last marking period….I remember her doing her work and the other kids clowning her for it, yet she ignored them and carried on with her new found ambition….it was such a beautiful thing…watching someone transform after just alittle belief in themself….before you know it, she went from being talked about in a negative context by her teachers to a positive one….I believe in 3 of her 4 major classes she won the class’s “most improved” award…watching her grow from an ignorant, self-absorbed, uncaring child into a respectful, hardworking, purpose-driven young lady was one of the most rewarding experiences in my short teaching career….

Life is funny though….the way things happen. Funny not necessarily meaning a good thing….funny meaning crazy….because that same child died the last week of school. What was supposed to be a joyous week for my kids, ended up being a clouded one…I taught this young lady and all of her friends, so my classes were the ones hit the hardest by this tragedy…I’ll never forget the phone call I got that Sunday afternoon from my principle…and how I just sat on my balcony for a good half-an-hour staring at nothing….it was hard….what was even harder was the following weekend at her wake…seeing the children react to their lost friend….again, i was TAUGHT another lesson from my kids…..life goes on..it must….

The next week….actually my last day of work for the school year, I layed down for a nap with the radio on like I always do…and well, I was awoken by the news of Michael Jackson dying….I thought I was dreaming but then my mom texted me and asked if he died….a whole another range of emotions swept through me….it was the weirdest feeling ever…I don’t know how or why, but a piece of me was numb because of this….maybe it’s because Michael was so big when I was a kid…I remember going to kindegarten and reacting the “Beat It” video with my buddies before class started….I remember saving all the magazine articles and newspaper articles from when his hair caught on fire….I remember being devasted sometime in 1988 when my dad’s soon-to-be-ex-wife tore down all of my MJ posters to get my dad pissed…..I remember having a life-sized Michael Jackson (from the BAD days) cut-out in my bedroom that used to scare my lil cousin…..I felt sorry for Michael…what he did to himself….his life is a true American tragedy….I’m not sure if it was the good times or bad times that affected me after his death, but either way, an American Legend passed away…and it messed me up for a while….I spent the whole weekend listening to KTU (New York’s 103.5)..the only station to play his music 24/7….putting Hot 97/Kiss 98/& WBLS to shame….

The last thing that happened in these 9 months that affected me was I turned 30…I was going to write a blog on my bday titled the “Roaring 20’s” and walk through my life as a 20-something, but didn’t….just like I didn’t write about the pride of Obama winning, or the Snowday with no Snow, or about Michael Jackson…I let myself fall off for a little bit, but it was much needed…I had to do me…and find me…and well, I did…..so, to sum up my 20’s, I learned that family or those you consider family should be the people who are priorities in life…and for me closure is the most important thing in my life….I could live without a lot of things, but one thing I need in my life is closure…one of the things that happened the year I turned 30 (also another idea for a blog that went unwritten) I realized that closure is such a big thing….my biggest weakness is dwelling on the past’s failures…but finding closure to a few of these big failures the past year (mainly failed relationships) was the best thing that could happen to me this year…that and growing up….I think one thing that really helped me through this was going to 3 different weddings of people very close to me this past year…that and seeing people I know have kids…A big goal of mine in my early-20’s was to be married and have kids by age 30…well, I’m very happy for my peoples that are doing those things right now, but I am so not ready for all that…and am glad they are not me! lol…life is about readjusting goals sometimes too….I think that comes with learning about closure…btw, I’m now shooting for marriage by age 35….just have a few more things I have to accomplish before then ; )

Anyways….I chose not to go into too much detail, although this blog is long enough, because 1. some things should be left private 2. I don’t wanna bore my reader too much, but I am going to end this blog with the finally piece of irony….I started working on getting my new t-shirts ready and my new website ready back in May…hoping it would be done by my 30th bday, which was on July 5th….well, it wasn’t done by then….everytime I started to get irritated about that I remembered what I learned and experienced the past 9 months and let it roll off my shoulders….then when the site was really done on August 5th, it really hit me….I was born exactly a month early….A month early isn’t considered premature…but it is obviliously early…so, with that being said….my site being done and this blog being written on August 5th means although I wasn’t on-schedule…I was right on-time…..hence the Rebirth of Slick…isn’t it just ironic that my last blog was exactly nine months ago??? BTW, I am recommitted to writing blogs weekly again…so, thanks for reading…come back next week!

Dave

What a crazy week…First, my Phillies win the World Series…..next is the biggest election in America’s History….Finally, later in the week is the first Eagles/Giants game of the year….I’m predicting they meet two more times after that…..anyways….

For the first time in my life, I had a team of mine win a Championship….yes, I watched the 1980 World Series…and the Sixers won the championship in 1983…and I did sneakily watch Penn States championship win over Miami in 1986….but this was the first one that I am old enough to remember forever…..how pathetic is that, that gives you a hint at how sad my life really is….lol…all I’m gonna say about that is….Phinally!

Now to more important issues….today is Election Day…finally….the day this country has been waiting for…What is going to happen?

Well, for the second time in my life, I voted….the first time was last election in 2004…when, as a registered Democrat, I voted for George Bush….this year, I voted Democrat all across the board…so, what does it mean??

I don’t know….I watched 2 of the 3 Presidential Debates (the last one was on during the World Series so I missed it)…and I cannot see how anyone could vote for John McCain….especially with Sara Palin as his running mate….I can’t see these two running the country….at the same time, I can’t see Obama winning either….My grandmother, whom also voted for Barack said it perfectly…”I can’t believe we are going to have a black president so soon.” Neither could I…

Some how, some way, I just don’t see it happening…I woke up this morning and watched CBS…one of the reporters said he thinks a lot of Republicans who are outwardly supporting McCain, will behind the voting curtains vote for Obama….and although, that makes sense because in my eyes, Obama is the man….I could see the same thing happening for White-America….I am white…I am very proud to be white, like anyone should be proud of their background and heritage…yet I voted for Barack Obama…in fact, most of my family is as well….But could Middle-America….all-White America really vote for a black president?

Unfortunately, I think this election is going to be an “Us vs. Them.” I feel that it is going to be like that in the hearts of many whites….and also many blacks….and that is sad…The best man should win….I live in a predominantly black neighborhood and stood in line today for about an hour surrounded by black voters and I think what Barack Obama has done for the black community is extraordinary…and if elected president, he will continue to do great things for the black community, but it is sad that it took Barack to get so many black people to vote….and it is sad that they are only voting for Barack because of his skin color….

On the flip side….there are many white people that are out there that are voting only for McCain because he is white….and that is also sad…for the life of me, I can’t believe that people could live with such ignorant views…I don’t understand how racism exists…I personally have white friends, black friends, latino friends, asian friends, arab friends, christian friends, jewish friends, and muslim friends…and I don’t understand how the rest of the world can’t get along the way we do….I’m not saying that their shouldn’t be ethnic pride….but why is there hate….

From what I see, and my views on how this country is, this is an “Us vs. Them,” election…and because, the majority of this country is a certain race….I believe McCain will be president….

Hopefully I am wrong….I do believe in Obama….the guy has done nothing but impress me, and he continues to do so everytime I hear hi speak…I just hope the rest of America would take the time to let him do the same…

Something screwy is going to happen….I really can’t see this country letting a black man be president…something like the Florida debacle might happen….or something weird like Barack will get the popular vote, but McCain will get the electoral vote….By the way, that whole system makes no sense to me….That whole “electoral vote vs popular vote” thing means my vote and your vote really don’t count….how is it, that in 2008 this is still the system way blows my mind as much as ballot machines breaking down on election day blows my mine….You know how many stories I have heard already about Voting/Ballot Machines breaking….ridiculous….

A lot of people are predicting a landslide victory for Obama….and I hope they are right….that makes the most sense to me….and if that is the case, I just hope that those racist whites from middle-America are smart enough, to change as well….and don’t do anything stupid….I could write a whole another blog on that fear of mine…but anyways…

The last thing I want to say….a lot of people talk bad about America and our putting our noses in other countries business….A lot of people think the U.S.A. does too much internationally when we have no business doing so, especially because other countries don’t want us doing so…well, if that much is true, watch the news and read the paper and tell me what you gather…..the whole world is paying attention to this election….proof that America still does matter…

Well, I don’t know how I feel about this blog…I know I did a lot of rambling…and just whipped something together (I’m still recovering from last week’s World Series win)….just know that I plan of expanding on this topic after the results are in….I just hope what I wrote is wrong….I am too proud-to-be-an-American to not believe in the country like I do….I hope I am wrong….and I hope Barack Obama is the next president of the United States….we should know in a few more hours….Phinally

It’s funny how people perceive the same things differently….Perceptions vary on all issues in life….sports, music, art, religion, politics, etc…It’s crazy how one person could look at a painting of just scribble…and another person look at it with a tear in their eye because of it’s beauty….or how about those paintings that when you first look at them you see one image, but after a closer look at it you see a totally different picture….

There are two things that made me write about this….The first was Friday night…I decided not to call anyone to go out….I was going to chill at home alone and watch the presidential debates, then get a much needed good night’s sleep. Well, as I mentioned a couple blogs ago, I haven’t really been paying attention to the presidential race and didn’t really know who to vote for….I do think we need to kick the republican party out of office….and for people that disagree, you have to look at the facts….look at how much our country changed for the worse the last 8 years…then again, that is my perception….Although, I believe this, I wouldn’t vote without knowing more details…I really would have to pay attention to whats going on before I made the decision….for example, I’m not one of those people that is gonna vote for one candidate because of his skin color or because of a vice president’s gender….I think that is pretty pathetic….in other words, if you are black and are voting for Obama just because he is black, or if you are a woman and you are voting for McCain just because his VP candidate is a female, I think that is pretty sad…..

In any event, I didn’t know exactly who to vote for, and I did watch Palin’s acceptance speech as well as McCain’s a couple weeks ago and enjoyed the speeches….At one point, I thought they would be my choices….then I spoke to two die hards….One die hard Republican and One die hard Democrat…..you know the ones…the ones, you can’t have a decent conversation with because they only see one-sided….well, the democrat was more convincing and explained the details to me better and yet again swayed my decision back to Barack….

Well, that still wasn’t enough, I had to see more for myself….So, Friday I watched the debates by myself (one of my good friends did the same, and we were texting each other back and forth about what was going on, like a bunch of nerds/old men..but anyways)….I was astonished at watching the after party…or should I say the interviews and opinions of people after the debate….In my eyes…my perception, Obama blew McCain out of the water….I think he outclassed him, and his points were just totally right on….After Friday, Obama got my vote…..and this is coming from a registered Democrat that voted for George Bush last election….I’m man enough to admit, that I didn’t vote for Kerry, but Georgie W. I won’t make that same mistake this election….I’m not going to go into details about what I liked…..but just Obama’s overall views on things from Iraq to the economy to education in my eyes were/are better….As of now, Obama has my vote and I have looking forward to Thursday’s VP debate (as long as it’s not going on during a Phillies’ playoff game)…

The other thing that made me write about perceptions was last weekend….Last weekend it was my grandparents 60th wedding anniversary….Now, I have a hard enough time hanging on to a lady friend for 60 days, let alone even fathoning holding on to one for 60 years!! But anyways, here is what I’m getting into….If you have been reading my blogs, you know that I have a funny grandmother….One, who has a heart of gold, but a mouth that doesn’t keep quiet when it comes to her point of views/perceptions….I love her enough to have her name tatoo’d on my arm, but at the same time she has the ability to drive me (along with everyone else in my family) nuts….I’ll save details for another blog, because my grandmother deserves a whole blog for herself. But here is the thing….my grandmother is very old fashioned when it comes to a lot of things, and one thing she doesn’t go for is change and outside-the-box thinking….and if you do, you find out how wrong you are, because she will tell you….anyways, last year, the last two of her three children followed their other sibling out west….my mom moved to Arizona and my uncle to Seattle….they did this for the pursuit of their own happiness and change….everyone that knows them was extremely happy for them except one person….yes, grandma….I’m going to save the details, but my grandmother refuses to do anything that involves leaving her house….she lives for her home….this is a lady that cleans 6-7 days a week 6-8 hours a day….and she will not change…..having fun and going away is really frowned upon…shoot, I caught hell for not working this summer, imagine that…

We all know how grandma is, and yes, make fun of her for it and try to change her, but at 82 years old it isn’t happening….So, my grandparent’s 60th wedding anniversary was this year, and like their 50th, their children wanted to take them on a trip….Disney, Vegas, an Alaskan Cruise, Caribbean Cruise, etc….whatever they wanted…..now my grandfather would do anything, but instead of saying so, he does whatever my grandmother wants….that is good for another blog in itself as well(and part of the reason why I fear marriage and committment)watching the abuse he takes isn’t good for my health…lol…actually, watching it reassures the fact that I will never settle…anyways…..Grandma wanted her kids to come home to Jersey and take her out to dinner….that was it…..everybody in the family, including myself thought she was nuts….why would she do such a thing…..she is retired, she should be seeing the world, enjoying her life…why does she refuse to leave her home??

Well, it hit me….we perceived my grandmother as this stubborn lady, who was selfish in regards to my grandfather because she could have went anywhere he/they wanted, but instead refused and stayed home…..we were wrong…this whole time, she just wanted what once was….her kids in her home…..the same kids that left Jersey because “who would want to live there!” had to come back….and for the first time in 3 years, and only the second time in eleven years, all her kids were back to the place where they were raised….my grandma made everyone go to church with her…..and as my one aunt said mockingly, for a “show-and-tell”…..Well, all we had to do as her kids, was look past our perceptions and view my grandmother’s and you will see how beautiful the time spent as a family in New Jersey was….Last Wednesday-Sunday was a great time….and for my grandmother, the lady of the hour, better than any cruise…..hey, home is where the heart is, right?? For once, I wish everyone perceived things the way grandma does…

Lastly, on September 11th, I was bored….the whole day didn’t seem like other 9-11’s….maybe that was a good thing, maybe it was a bad thing….I went to work, not much was said about the day (again either good or bad)…I got home, and usually on this day, I am glued to the television and/or reading a newspaper looking at pictures, documentaries, etc of what happened in 2001….this year I didn’t, nor did I want to get myself in a gloomy mood….In fact, I wasn’t in the mood to do anything…sleep, read, work, workout, watch a dvd, go out….nothing…but for whatever reason I hopped online….and began googling random things…..I was racking my brain for interesting things to come up with and google….I even got to the point of thinking of people from the past….I eventually googled an old friend….someone whose past relationship, scratch that, past friendship I cherish….

I googled this person, who in my heart-of-hearts, from time-to-time I believe still reads my blogs….well, this is a person, whom I basically forgot about, but yet the memory of them, when I think of them every now and then, brings a smile to my face….this is a person who I got really close with in a short period of time, but had to leave for various reasons…a quote from Bon Jovi’s song, Wild is the Wind, hopefully puts things into perspective, especially since I never did share my true feelings for this person with them,

“I couldn’t be the one to make your dreams come true/
that’s why I had to run/ though I needed you”

While I left this person to take care of things (because it was the right thing to do), this person found someone to sweep them off their feet…selfishly, I let that bother me at first (for about a week), but as time went by, I realized it was the best thing for this person, and I’ve grown to appreciate that our time spent together led to this person’s finding of true happiness….

On September Eleventh, I came across this person’s bridal registry….and the picture I saw of this person, and the glow on their face made it all worth it….What do I mean by “all,” our time spent together, the pain of losing this person, and the stumbling of me on the registry….all I want to tell this person, if they are reading is that, it was all about your happiness….all I wanted to do was make you happy….I see you have true happiness, and that makes me feel good…even if it wasn’t me that made you happy….I almost called you a year ago, to tell you that I wanted your friendship back and that I accepted the fact, that I wasn’t the “one” for you, but didn’t…I figured it was best to just let things be…just know, that I do cherish our time together, and in my eyes, you are one of the most amazing people I ever met…your strength/story is a true inspiration for me….I never saw you as a “suicidal freak” and I hope you know this….you will always have a place in my heart….good luck next month….hope you have the storybook ending you deserve….

I was gonna send you a gift on your wedding day, but wasn’t sure if that was such a good idea, so instead I dedicate this blog to you….especially since you told me that I should write….Lots of luck with your JD

Love,

DD

3 days left…..can’t believe my dream summer is almost over….actually, it is over….as much as I am ready to go back to work, and need to go back to work….I don’t want to go back to work…Because of this summer, I feel like a kid all over again, which is ridiculously ironic since I am now teaching kids….

So, it is Labor Day Weekend, and I am supposed to be down the Jersey Shore right now, but when I got home 5 in the morning earlier today, it was pouring out….so, one and a half weeks of planning with my boys to head south for today was foiled….what stung even more is that it was sunny out when I first woke up at 11….and it was sunny out when I woke up again at 12, 1:30 and also 2:30 when I finally decided to roll out of bed! So, instead of being surrounded by beach babes while baking in the sun, I am writing for you guys! haha…luckily I enjoy doing that as well though!

With the way this summer went though, I really have no real reason to complain…sure there were highs and lows all summer long, but for the most part, this has been by far one of the best summers I have had in a real long time….maybe one of the best all-time….and the crazy part is that I am already thinking ahead to next summer….although it is the summer I turn the big 3-0….which is cool, yet something that I am not too thrilled about….guess that is the kid in me again….

So, what has happened since my last blog and what is about to happen in the near future?? I will tell you….First, I been trying to write this blog for the last two weeks but couldn’t log in…because I started a task of bringing about 20 boxes worth of crap from my storage unit and my father’s to my apartment around the same time, I put getting the problem fixed with logging in to the back burner….yes, those 20 boxes of things were spread out all over my apartment for the last 2 weeks…I literally dedicated my life to organizing these things and plan on putting a lot of it on eBay, a very very time consuming ordeal….I am finally almost done with them! I have caught some heat from some of my loyal readers for not writing in such a long time, so here is my apology, and my thanks, because I am touched to get so much mail for my blogs….thanks…and here we go….

After my trip, the summer has really flew by….although 6 weeks is still a long time….a lot has happened in that time….first I got hit with the old fashioned “You don’t know what you got till it’s gone” mantra…..I’m not going to go into detail, but it stemmed from a decision I made a few months prior which goes against the old saying, “One in the hand is worth more than two in the bush.” Use your imagination folks…..anyways, I’m over it…

I just wonder if Manny Ramirez is going through the same thought process as I did earlier in the month, going from the Red Sox that will make the playoffs to the Dodgers, a team that won’t…then again when you make $20 million a year to play baseball, do you really care?? I must admit, I really lost a lot of respect for this guy. He was one of my favorite ball players and to see him get him self kicked out of Boston the way he did is a disgrace….especially when his beef was that he wanted a contract to make $25 million a year….what an asshole….totally reminded me of Terrell Owens…as much as I hate that baby, atleast T.O. always played hard despite being a jerk off…..I can’t believe Manny would ruin his legacy for money like that….if you are dead broke, that’s one thing, but when you have been earning millions of dollars a year for about 14 years, you have no right…he is one of the many things that is wrong with our society today…

Also, in regards to baseball, it sucks watching my 2008 Phillies play like the 2007 Mets…such a terrible week for my Phils, falling 2 games behind first place, when they should be atleast 2 games ahead….As much as I am disappointed, I should know by now that they play their best ball in September….so, Mets’ fans, don’t get gassed!

Also, to my fellow New Yorkers/New Jerseyans….if you are a Giants’ fans, enjoy the memory of last season because this year’s team is going 7-9 . Your boy Eli is going to come back down to earth and the Eagles are going to reclaim the NFC Conference….just remember you heard it here first ; )
It was cool watching what your boys did last year, and made for a great “feel-good” story, but the fairy tale is over….believe me…anyways…

Getting back to the summer, because I don’t want to think about the fall yet….am I the only 29 year old straight male that was hooked on the “Two Coreys” this summer….I haven’t made myself work a schedule around a television show since the Sopranos…and that was the first time since I used to do it for 21 JumpStreet when I was in 6th grade….I know I’m not the only one rooting for Corey Haim….although I probably am the only one who bought 7 of his movies on dvd in one shot then watched 6 of those 7 in a two day period (still have one left, but I let that apartment thing control my life the last 2 weeks)….I will buy the remaining 6 that are available on dvd soon….seriously though….am I the only Corey Haim fanatic out there (that is straight- I have to make sure that is very clear…haha…no offense)….I was going to go to Cherry Hill for Monster Mania to meet him last weekend, but I didn’t….I was so stressed about my apartment being a mess, I decided to be a “grown-up” versus a kid this time, and finish the project I started versus meeting one of my teen idols….haha….some FYI, Corey is going to be in 2 new movies this year…Crank 2 and Shark City . I am so disappointed that he wasn’t in Lost Boys 2 more…yes I bought it on DVD (the day it came out)….anyways…let the Corey Haim Comeback carry on…

Speaking about not acting like a grown-up, I am very ashamed of myself for not following what is going on for this ever-so-important presidential election…what is happening with speeches and VP candidates and first ladies, etc I am very ignorant on….haven’t followed a thing…I’ll be sure to make that my homework though…i’ll get myself caught up eventually, I promise…I am very embarrased by the way….

Back to fun stuff though, in music news, this was a very boring summer….I was priviledged to go to the Rock the Bells concert, which was incredible, and supposed to be a topic of my next blog, but eventually wasn’t.One of the performer, Nas, did deliver an amazing album (as always) this summer….he never disappoints (I even love Nastradomus, which no one else apparently does)…it was cool that he had a politically charged/militant album, but was tasteful about it and didn’t go overboard….he got his pro-black points across without sounding racist, which unfortunately not too many rappers do….that was definitely a big plus in my book….The RZA’s Bobby Digital album was solid, too, but was still yet another disappointment for me (in regards to Rza albums)….this fall should be good though…Joe Budden and Everlast both have albums dropping in September…by far the two most slept on people in the music industry! Maybe I will write a blog soon with my thoughs on the rap game…

The last thing that I want to mention, was that I got together with an old acquaintance earlier this month, and we talked about revamping this website alittle bit….although things are moving slower than expected, look for a possible new format to the website as well as some much needed new t-shirts….I already got the new url set up and the t-shirt designs thought up….it’s just going to take alittle time…but expect it….also, for those that have been following my record label, Ivy Storm, we have been talking about making another push with that as well. Look for some new music and New Jersey-based t-shirts from Ivy Storm Entertainment, also….

With these two works in progress, maybe you could see why I am already looking forward to next summer….hindsight is always 20/20, so I already know how I’m going to do things different on a personal level, but also with some fresh ideas in my head and in my surroundings, I plan on having a busy 2009 on the entreprenuerial level as well…..stay tuned….in the meantime, have a good fall….enjoy the warm weather while it lasts!Before you know it, we will be talking about the Holidays!

It’s funny how new things could seem so old….I’m not necessarily talking about deja vu, I’m just saying how new experiences seem old…..I just got home from the 16 day trip I took with my father, trying desperately to get used to Eastern Standard Time again….This was the first father/son trip we have taken since Spring Training in 2002, right before I moved to Boston, right after I graduated from Temple University…and that was the first trip we took since 1997….

Our first destination was a flight to Las Vegas….because of my father’s travels to Atlantic City over the years, he accumulated enough points to earn him 3 free nights at Paris Casino/Resort….so, like the destination of three of our previous trips, Vegas it was…..It felt like old times walking through Vegas with my dad, but this would be the first in which father and son gambled together….the three previous times we were in Vegas together, I was 13, 16, and 17….

I wish I could say we came, saw and conquered….but that wasn’t the case….at one point I was down $400 (until my miraculous comeback the last night to get me within being $100 down)…and Lord only knows how much my old man lost….all I know is he stayed hours after I would throw in the towel and play….and he kept losing….hopefully he reaccumulated enough points to win us another trip for next year….haha…the highlight of Vegas besides chillin with my boy Eric, who lives out there, was when in the hotel lobby approaching the elevator, my father let out one of the loudest farts I have ever heard….we escaped from the public eye by hopping on the elevator…yes, he is most of the reason of why I am so demented…the poor souls that heard that thing, too!

The next stop was Arizona…….to visit my mother, whom I haven’t seen in over 7 months…by far the longest stretch I have ever gone without seeing my mom….this is always a good trip because I have an aunt, uncle and two cousins that live out there as well….Because it was my birthday the previous weekend, my mother decided to have the family over for dinner and let me invite some old PA friend and their families whom now live out in the dessert….I definitely had a lot of fun catching up with these two cats, Tony and Wes…we were so tight earlier in the decade, but somehow our lives went separate paths the last five years….we definitely shared some laughs and had lots of old stories to tell….I think my mom having a Spiderman table cloth, plates, and napkins made it even better! I taught her well at trying to embarrass people….lol…a chip off the old block….

Speaking of embarrassing, if I was one to get embarrassed easily, I would say me getting lost while going for a jog would have done the trick….Saturday around 1pm, it was about 102 degrees outside and I figured I’d go for a little run, ignoring my mom’s advice not to…I even managed to laugh at her advice of bringing a bottle of water and my cell phone….well, 45 minutes into running, I realized I was lost….this would have been no big deal if I knew her new address or even her phone number (who remembers numbers anymore with cell phones)…needless to say, I was walking around for an hour quite parched and getting sunburnt…I didn’t even put on sunblock, I was going to wait til I got back…I was supposed to chill with my lil cousin by the pool…but by the time I got home, I had enough of the sun and didn’t go swimming til much later….That was one of the few times in my life that I felt uncool….and of course hearing the “I told you so” from my mom didn’t help either….atleast I know how to laugh at myself…imagine wanting to ask directions of how to get a place that you don’t even know the address?

Monday, my father and I packed up and hit the road for Sunny California and the West Coast….the only part of the country to elude us during our many (seven) trips….losing $200 at some small AZ casino didn’t deter my excitement either! Anyways, we spent the next two nights in San Diego…one of those nights visiting a long lost cousin, whose back yard is one big train set…that’s right….kinda like the old Mr. Rogers set-up…this guy pulled out all kind of Collector Train Magazines that he has been in….and yes, I thought it was cool, I just wish I wasn’t too proud to take pics….lol…by the way, San Diego is a clean city that is sunny and 75 degrees 365 days a year….don’t be surprised if you hear of me moving out there anytime soon!!

I think the highlight of San Diego for my dad was the fact that there was a Sizzler there…that’s right East Coast readers!! Sizzler still exists!! Just when I thought they were all extinct…they aren’t…they are alive and kicking on the West Coast….They all got the same big-ass menu on the wall when you first walk it…you gotta wait in line, pick what you want, pay for the meal, get your number and tray then go sit down…order your drink and the hit the salad bar/buffett…whatever you want to call it, just like back in the day….and guess what?? The chicken wings are exactly the same! and so is the steak!!! Tastes exactly how I remember it!! My father has been talking about how much he misses Sizzler’s steaks for years now!! And he didn’t even finish his! hahaha…I still remember the last time I was at one…the summer of 1994….yes, I know I’m weird…anyways…the low light of this Sizzler….??

There was no Bacos!! I absolutely love going to salad bars and making myself a healthy salad overflowing the plate with everything and top it off with Shredded/Gratted American Cheese, French Dressing, and then Bacos!! Do they even make Bacos anymore??? Well, Sizzler didn’t have any! They didn’t even have French Dressing…I decided to do something different though…I used Thousand Island Dressing…the last time I had that was in elementary school….I used to get the hot lunches….and once in a while we’d get salad (if you could call it salad, there was usually just lettuce) in a little styrofoam cup…on lucky days there were gratted carrots in there….but anyways…these salads always had Thousand Island Dressing….that is the only time I ever had it myself!! Someone please feel me on this!! Tasting this Sizzler Salad in San Diego brought me right back to elementary school and the 80’s!!

Our next stop was in Los Angeles for a day/night…we hit up Hollywood, and wow! What a dump….yes, it is nothing but one big tourist trap…the walk of fame is a joke…what a dirty place!! Santa Monica was cool….although there are more bums than sea gulls at the beach….our Days Inn on Santa Monica Blvd was heavily over-priced, but yet, I was still digging the city….Unfortunately I forgot my camera when I met up with two more long lost friends….got together with a friend from Boston, whom I haven’t seen in about 5 years (Dave) and one of my old college roommates (Tom)that I haven’t seen in 6.5 years…definitely had a blast playing pool that night…even though I suck at pool….by the way, I was very disappointed on the so-called “California Girls.” I didn’t see any!! None that were remembering anyways…hmmm

I must admit that I was wrong about San Francisco….This is one city that really didn’t excite me…why? Well, the obvious reason…the stereotype….I mean, I’m no homophobe, but the thought of being around men that, well….are into men, isn’t really my idea of a good time….well, not only did I only see one pair of dudes kiss, but the city wasn’t half bad….take away that one site and the fact that it was under 60 degrees, and this was my favorite city….yes, we went from driving in 107 degree dessert to me having to buy a jacket when it was 57 degrees our first night, but the city was dope….It was a city that has an East Coast feel, yet was very West Coast….the Golden Gate Bridge was amazing, Fisherman’s Wharf was cool…and we saw a Giants game, which was at a dope stadium….

Unfortunately, San Diego, LA, and obviously San Fran wasn’t too hot…weather wise….and I actually lost my tan in Sunny California!!! Not that I am one to go tanning, but I have been laying out by the pool at my apartment complex and hitting the Jersey Shore and got my self a nice lil bit of color…well, after Cali, and the remaining cold states, it’s gone!!

California was crazy….we saw sand dunes, mountains, redwoods, beaches, etc….but by far the most beautiful state on our trip was Oregon….so what the cities are the size of towns back home, and so what that everyone drove 5 miles under the speed limit…there were some spectacular views along the coast on route 101….and well, I lost another $100 in some Oregon Casino and the locals hated me , but I still dug Oregon!

Washington was our next stop….and thank goodness I have family there, too…..why? you might ask….well, the excitement of the father/son trip was starting to wear off, and it is safe to say both my father and myself were starting to get on each other’s nerves….not bad though, we went about 10 days from what I remember before that happened….

We stayed in Washington the remaining 4 nights….2 of those with my Uncle Ralph and Aunt Maureen….my uncle, who is my godfather, is very much like my dad…when we are together, he is either the coolest guy in the world, or he gets on my nerves very easily….well, this trip he was good, and we had a blast….it was both fun and funny seeing him and my father bond the way they did….you see, not only is he my MOM’S brother, but he used to bash my father and talk a lot of crap about him to me at family functions…something from my childhood that I never understood, especially since the two didn’t really know each other….but any ways, that’s neither hear nor there….

Aside from the bonding we had in Washington and going to the Mariners/Red Sox game (I bought my dad and uncle tickets for father’s day), the highlight of Washington was me seeing my first ever Bald-headed Eagle….for whatever reason, my father is into Birds of Prey…and like most little boys, I tended to get into whatever my father was into…..women, baseball, gambling, The Three Stooges, farting, and….Birds of Prey…When I was about nine years old or so and when gas was cheap, my father and I would go “riding around” Pennsylvania and New Jersey looking for yard sales (to find baseball cards) and look for Hawks, Eagles, etc. Obviously, we did this in the woodsy/farmland areas of these two states, not the burs or cities….Well, we have driven in 40 + states with our eyes to the skies looking for a bald-headed or American Eagles as some people refer to them as, but we never found one….just the mystique of seeing one, made this bird of prey my favorite animal….I remember in tenth grade, probably 1995ish, in English, we had to write a paper on, “What Would Break Us Into Blossom.” I wrote about two pages worth of why seeing an eagle would break me into blossom…everyone else wrote about half-a-page’s worth….they all got A’s because they added pictures….I got a B because I didn’t….but anyways….

We had nothing to do on Tuesday, so, my uncle suggested we rent a boat and sail around the Puget Sound…at first I was cool with it, then I realized that there would be no woman around, and it would be only us three in a boat in the middle of the cold water….I tried sneakingly getting my uncle to change his mind (especially since my dad secretly told me he really didn’t want to do it), but I couldn’t break my uncle’s heart, because since he moved out there last November, he has been wanting to do it….Well, an hour into the trip, Steve Miller’s “Fly like an Eagle,” came on the radio…I just knew we were about to see an eagle….we didn’t….not until two songs later…..and you know what?? That made the trip out to the middle of the Sound worth it….that and the male bonding as well….words can’t describe how cool it was seeing my dad chilling with my mom’s side of the family….anyways, we spent 45 minutes staring at this bird…I was driving the boat at this point when I first spotted the thing…I panicked and had my uncle take over as I couldn’t get my eyes off it…I had to get a better look, I was breaking into blossom (as corny as that sounds)…and what a show he put on for us….and all he did was move his head, ocassionally…lol…we took about 2o pictures….needless to say we went over our 2 hour limit….good thing the Coast Guard pulled us over…that gave us a copp out for being late….anyways…just seeing that bird for me, made that 2 hour cold sailing trip worth it…..just when it couldn’t get better, as we were headed back to the dock in the sky there appeared like 6 more flying above us…I even witnessed one dive in the water only to come up empty handed….but as he missed his fish, he stopped in mid-air, hovered alittle bit, and started to fly backwards debating on whether to go back for a second crack at it…..he didn’t but the sight was still amazing….So, amazing, my describing it isn’t giving the sight justice….I’m loss for words about it…

After 16 days, I was ready to come home, but both my father and I agree, it was the most amazing trip we ever took…..there were some bad times….the gambling losses, the cold weather, the aggravating debates between me and my dad, the forgetting of my camera when I was with my friends….but there were also many good times…the bonding, the catching up with old friends and family, the scenery, and the eagle….but the most amazing part of the trip…and by far my favorite was in Arizona…

My dad and I spent 3 nights with my mom….I was hoping to go out those nights with my cousins or friends and check out the night life, but that never happened….what did happen though, was I spent 3 night watching television with my parents for the first time in my life….my parents got divorced when I was 2 and a half, so obviously it has happened before, but this was the first time that I could remember….my dad was laying on the love seat, me on one end of the couch and my mom on the other….it was a stand still moment for me…I can’t even remember what movies we watched or what was on TV, I was too caught up in the moment…..I have been asked a lot how my parents divorce has affected me…and I don’t know…I was very young…and honestly I wouldn’t change how I grew up for anything in the world….but at the same time, there was nothing like watching TV with the two people I love more than anything in this world…..that made the whole half-a-month trip worth it…

Life isn’t about money, material things, sex, clothes, music, power, respect….it’s about memories….and family….I always knew this and tried to live by this, but for the first time in my life, I experienced what that really meant…..that picture of the three of us will be instilled in my head forever…and I didn’t even need my camera for it!!!

“Here it is the groove slightly transformed
just a bit of a break from the norm
just a little somethin’ to break the monotony…”

Yes, this blog is long over due. I would like to apologize to the several people that have been getting on me for not writing one in a minute….Trust me, I am flattered not only by your readership, but loyalty…..So, here it is…the latest coming from Dave’z Mental….

Today is July 4th….in my mind, the official start to the summer….Yes, Memorial Day weekend kicks off the summertime in America, but July 4th is like the real deal….think of it as the NFL….Preseason games start in August….yes, football season techinically started, but you have to wait 4 weeks til the real deal, for games that count….same concept here….well, today is kickoff to opening day…where the season really starts….

The title of my blog refers to my summer….this is the summer I have been looking forward to for years…..Close to a decade…you see, I haven’t had an ideal summer since I was a junior or senior in high school…that’s damn near 11-12 years ago.

“…think of the summers of the past
adjust the base and let the alpine blast…”

Summertime, I believe is special in everyone’s heart….For me it brings back childhood memories of life being care-free. Personally, when I think of the Summer, the time that first pops into my head is hanging out in my father’s trailer park neighborhood….I would say the 1989-1991 era….Probably 1990 was my favorite…that was the year I graduated fifth grade….back when the Two Coreys ruled the world….by the way, am I the only one that is hooked on that show (although I did miss the first season)?? And for those of you who do watch….I hope I’m not the only one pulling for Corey Haim…he is still the “man” in my eyes (no homo)….and I am looking forward to Lost Boys 2 coming out on dvd on July 29th….anyways….

Going to my father’s neighborhood pool is the first thing that pops into mind….you see, I only saw my dad on weekends when I was a kid, but I spent much more time there in the summer time (even though he worked)….I remember him giving me a $5 “meal allowance” as he would call it…my father has the illest vocabulary of anyone I know by the way….my summer day when I was with my pops was very routine….wake up close to noon, play with my baseball cards for a little….then hop on my bike, go to the store with my $5…go to Uni-Mart, which had the best hotdogs…buy a Philadelphia Inquirer, a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos, 2 dogs for $1 and a Lipton Iced Tea….from there hit the pool with my walkman, and chill listening to either one of my 3 favorite artists….you guessed it, Bon Jovi, DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince, or gasp…Milli Vanilli…hey, that CD is bomb!! Don’t deny it, girl, you know it’s true!!! That to me was “The Life.”

Anyways, thinking of my Jersey Days…cause I did have 2 different lives growing up, my mom’s WHOLE family would hit Wildwood…there would be like 30 of us split between 2 or 3 hotels…and July 4th would be kicked off at my grandma’s house, where she would have over 50 people there….what an amazing time….

Of course, as time goes by, things change….eventually, I outgrew that pool….and my family started to get families of their own, and my grandmother stopped having the everybody over….people go their separate ways and things become different…it’s somewhat depressing, but life evolves…

During my adolescent years, summertime meant taking that cross country trip with my dad….every year we would hop in his 1986 Monte Carlo and hit the road….1991 we made it as far as St. Louis, 1992 Vegas, and 1993 the Black Hills of South Dakota and Wyoming….1994 there was no trip, but 1995 and 1996 again we hit Vegas….There are whole other blogs I could write about them days….1997 took a short trip to Minnesota, and then that was it….

1998 changed my life forever (temporarily)….This is when I started to work for Vector Marketing Corporation….The “knife thing” as most college kids call it….I became a Cutco salesman….I have nothing but great memories from selling knives….but I was brainwashed as some might put it to making it my life…In a nutshell, when you start working for this company, they teach you how to be your own entreprenuer (which I loved)….you start by selling these incredible products to your family and friends then develop a referral base from them and keep on selling….for the people that actually have the balls to stick that out (because it sounds like such a weird/hard concept, which it is), you will make a lot of sales and money because the product basically sells itself…..but what then happens is the company recruits you for management, which is both a blessing and a curse….

I call it a blessing because I am who I am today because I accepted that challenge….but it’s a curse because it is one of the hardest things one could do…especially as a college kid…your job (if you are dedicated and have the will power) becomes a 24/7 job of recruiting your own sales force and motivating them to sell these knives….

In 1999, as a 19-about-to-be-20 year old, I opened up my own office for this company on Delaware Avenue in Philadelphia……my life consisted of working 70-80 hours a week….advertising, interviewing, recruiting, selling, motivating….being a friend, mentor, boss, psychiatrist, etc for my 100+ recruits/workers…all as a 19 year old….I found my own office, I paid the rent, I found my own secretaries, I paid their paychecks….I was the “man.” And all my friends thought so, but all my family thought I was nuts….a lot of responsibility! You barely have time to breathe!

Most 19 year olds are being bums, sleeping til noon, going to the beach (if you live close to one), partying, goofing-off, you know, doing typical college kid things in the summer…..not me…I was my own boss and embraced it….I did the same after my junior year, and decided not to study abroad in Italy after my senior year to do this job again….I graduated from Temple University December 2001 with a resume stacked with greatness, a confidence like none other, a new car, and a fat bank account….I could have done anything I wanted….so, what did this hot-shot 22 year old do?? He moved to Boston to open up his own office and make this job his life……he did so with great successes and great failures, but with no regrets….

I ended my knife selling run in December 2004….I was worn out and broke….I mismanaged my money and ran my business into the ground….There were a lot of uncontrollable things that messed me up (losing a top guy to Iraq, a flood, a theft, a recession, a change in company policy, bad advice from a superior)…some bad decisions (taking the month of March 2003 off for a cruise and an Italy trip, moving my office in early 2004 when I had a lot of momentum going)….some bad luck as well, but the bottom line is a lesson learned….I could write a whole other blog on my Boston days and lessons learned…we’ll see (because I put all this behind me)….but back to the summer time…

I moved back with my dad in 2005, broke but not beaten down…..after toying with the idea to get into teaching in college, my mother urged me to get into education, but after being broke for a year and a half, I wasn’t having it….I wanted to make money, I needed that power again….and I needed it now….I took on a job as a recruiter for the country’s biggest recruiting firm in Center-City Philadelphia….I started to make some serious money again….I was really good at my job….loved the paycheck…loved taking the train to Philly everyday to work….agreed to get an apartment in Philly (6 months into the job), but the day before I was to sign my lease, I realized I hated my life…..I hated my job….the people were cool (most of the time), but I hated the grind….I was burned out from sales….so, what did I do?? I quit….and moved back home with mommy….lol

I decided to pursue teaching….got into substitute teaching in early 2006 and continued to do so until January of this year……where I finally landed a real teaching job and became Mr. D. the real teacher, as opposed to Mr. D. the cool substitute teacher…..

And this gets me back to the opening of this blog…..from 1999-2004 I didn’t have a summer….at age 25-26 in 2005, I had to do the grown-man-at- a-new-job/corporate america thing, so really couldn’t take off and once again worked 60 hour weeks (sales)….2006 I didn’t get a summer job, tried hustling, but failed to make the money to make the summer comfortable, and 2007 worked as a scaffolder…..

Well, it’s now 2008, and I am one day away from my 29th b-day (I already have another blog written in my head about that!)…..and I am ready for the summer to start….I didn’t become a teacher just to have summers off, but this is the one summer I have been looking forward to in such a long time….through my life lessons, I budgeted my money throughout the year and have just enough to get me through till September’s first paycheck…..so, no summer job for me!!! So, stop asking me people!

So, what am I going to do you ask?? Well, today I am going to Grandma’s for a bbq…to the house where there was over 50 people on this day 20 years ago, there will be only 5…that’s depressing, but it’s life…and it is still time well spent with family….Tomorrow I’m hitting AC for my birthday, just hope I don’t blow my well-budgeted money…the goal is to double it!!

Tuesday, me and my dad are taking our first trip in 6 years….our first summertime cross country trip in 12 years…we aren’t driving due to gas prices, but we are gonna fly…sometimes I feel like I’m alittle too old to be taking a trip like this, but that’s the asshole in me…I am very excited….My dad wanted to go for a whole month, but I told him I couldn’t do that, so we are going for about 2.5 weeks….we are flying to Vegas for three days, then to AZ for three days….gonna see my mom for the first time in half a year, then we are renting a car driving to San Diego and driving up the whole West Coast….we are going to fly home from Seattle on the 24th….Due to money issues back in the day, we never made it out to Cali….well, we are going to make it now….I can’t wait!!

We were Long Over Due…..

Twist my wrist, I can’t go on like this….

Both my title and first sentence from this blog come from one of my favorite Bon Jovi songs….Temptations….

I have been fantasizing with the thought of just running away….not because I am sad, not because things are going wrong, not for any reason other than the fact that…..”Sometimes I feel I just gotta get away.” That’s a line from the Mobb Deep song, “Get Away.”

See how weird I am…who quotes Bon Jovi in one sentence then Mobb Deep in another…but, that is how I’ve been feeling….not weird, just in the mood to get away…

I’m stuck in a “tired of the grind” mode. Work is cool. I love my kids. Had an interesting, character building two weeks, followed by a week off, then last week was a good week, yet somewhere in the past month, I’ve had the “Runaway” mentality (another Bon Jovi song). Maybe it was an occurrence that might cost me my job in June….maybe it was the two rough weeks….maybe it was the daydreaming that I should be doing something else with my life….Maybe it was the fact that I came into a little bit of money for the first time in half a decade and realized that I could be doing other things….like living a real-estate mogul….lol….

I don’t know…I have a lot of goals, and a lot of dreams…..one fantasy is to just disappear……and…start over?? Not sure…..to maybe find myself?? Don’t know about that either…..maybe to try to make it big elsewhere?? I really don’t know why I would get up and leave….it’s like a story with no ending in sight….When I think about running from it all, I have no purpose as to why I would do it…..It’s like watching a movie and having no clue as to how it is going end….just like “No Country For Old Men.” Then again, I think after watching that movie a lil over a month ago is where I got the idea to pack up and go….

I can’t seem to find myself and purpose….Part of me wants to settle down and start a family, yet the other part, wants no parts of that….lol…..I want to live like I’m in my early twenties, yet can’t get my self to do it, because I have goals of an older man, and, well….am an older man….I am almost in my early thirties….I see people I grew up with and chill with planning weddings, having kids and celebrating wedding anniversaries, and although I would like to accomplish those things one day….don’t want them NOW…I’ve been asked how I feel about my fellow late-20-something peeps doing their grown-up things, and I have no opinion….I don’t envy them nor do I feel bad for them….yes, I would like to get there eventually, but just not now……I feel like I have some more living to do…..maybe that’s why I keep pushing out all the great girls in my life…..I tend to come across some amazing females….ones that would like to get into something serious with a guy like me, and ones that the average guy would love to wife-up, but I am far from ready for that……it’s funny because as recent as 3 years ago, I was yearning for love…..but not now….one day, yes…..but now I am yearning for something else….I just don’t know what that is….

I live in a one bedroom apartment by myself in North/Central NJ….make decent money, have a decent savings….would like to buy my own place one day, but also think about running away (a lot)….here is what I thought about doing….selling all of my belongings via Ebay and Craiglist! I mean everything…..people that know me, know that I am a Collectible/Memorbilia hound….that was my life from age 9-19….and even though I stopped being psycho with collectibles in my 20’s I still saved a bunch of things….so, I have basically 20 years of collectible items collecting dust in storage units and my father’s house…..I have dreamed about selling all of it….then selling all of my furniture….I have incredibly beautiful furniture that my mom left me when she moved to AZ….then upload my thousand CD’s to one of my laptops, and sell all my used CD’s….then unload my T-shirts mad cheap…..that would leave me with my clothes, Ipod, Laptop, car……and a decent amount of cash (considering I easily sell everything)…..

From there, I would just drive…..where….I don’t know…..Vegas?? Crash with my buddy Eric and maybe start a real estate business?? Sounds like a plan….or maybe I would drive to LA and crash with my old college roommate Tom….try to get into showbiz….either as an actor or rapper…haha…I have never acted nor rapped in my life, but believe I could do both….if I tried….I mean, I don’t have stunning good looks to make it just on looks alone, but I’m ok to look at…..and I got charm, charisma, and some talent, I suppose….lol…..maybe I’ll just move down south or in the middle of nowhere out west where everything is cheap….but what the hell would I do…..In my life time I have dreamed about living in the big city….but also the country…..I used to totally see myself living in NYC or Philly….but that was in my businessman days….I am far past that…me living in the middle of no where though……I would love to get away from it all and do that….but what would I do? Try to run some internet business and find a country girl?? I have no clue…..

I feel that I am too old to be thinking this way….but at the same time, I am still in my 20’s…..I mean I hear all the time from my grandmother that when she was my age she was married and had 2 kids already….that means nothing to me….I just wish I had the ambition doing all this traveling in my early 20’s or late teens…I would have done it….who knows….maybe I would have said screw America and went out to Europe (when the dollar was worth something)….that would have been fun…like my cyber buddy Danica is doing….I can’t do that though…..the Euro costs way too much and I’m not comfortable going where most people don’t speak English…that is too scary for me…

Well, the bottom line is this….unless something crazy comes over me in the summer, I am staying put….I have my grandparents to look after, and a career that is starting to bud…..shoot, I even am starting to save for my retirement again….something I haven’t done since I was 23….the last time I made grown-up money…..unfortunately I don’t have the balls to pull a stunt like this….but I will daydream about it to escape reality when need be….

“So, I’ll finish this blog with the ending to “Temptations,”

“Temptation…
Temptation…
Go home…
Lord,I’m walking straight into the ocean
Tell the tide I’m on my way…
I’m gonna hang my head down tonight on Damocles’ sword”